few and far in between

Well , well , well. regretfully,shamefully,unfortunately, its been 4 years since my last blog. maybe i've been too busy,maybe i've been too lazy,cant say whether they are two different things or extensions of the same.
anyways,im here now. onwards we go fellow bloggers.
a lot has changed since i last came here, my whole world, my whole life,me. its time to go again. its funny how that time keeps coming around. its like the separation anxiety and the growing pangs i never had attack me now with a vengeance.
love and its many forms. silly love, sweet love, romantic love, desperate love,painful love. i wanted passion! a real fire in my relationship. its simple high school physics really, whether there's fire, there's heat and if you descend into the fire you will get burnt. if not today, then tomorrow.there is ample hindu mythology even to support my theory.
so im burning now. after so many years i can actually feel the flames licking my skin. i thought i knew pain, had conquered pain blah blah and blah.
oh well life goes on.
the sun always keeps its promise and rises again. whether you want to accept it or not, the new day is here. the sun is shining on your face, the humidity is hitting your nostrils, sweat is running down your back and your mind is still hanging vaguely between am i here and do i really want to be here. yes darling , you are here. * clap clap* snap out of it. step up and be a man.
teenage tears,high school fears, irritating peers and mocking jeers.
im angry, im annoyed, im sad,im happy,im tortured and i want to run so fast into the horizon that i dont even have time to think, i want to scream louder than my throat would allow and then wait for the pain to descend on me.
yes i want to run away from you and your accusations and your hurtful words and mean spirited comments. i want to run run and run until the breath catches in my chest , i feel like am being knifed am so out of breath and yes the sun is still shining in my face.
where do we go now?
is there anybody who's there for me?